faking it til' I make it!

I am reusing this picture because these days, I need the reminder. You see me smile, but if my eyes aren't smiling, you're being duped. You hear my jolly tone, but if you notice, it's canned. Fake it til' you make it mode is in full effect right now. 

It's just the time of year- warm weather is gone, chilly weather is settling in, bye bye camper, bye bye lazy summer days. Halloween is over, so everyone will go straight to Christmas and bypass my favorite holiday- Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving with no gifts, lots of food, family, fun and football. My favorite holiday!

I am grateful. I am blessed. I am making plans to beat the upcoming winter blues. We are going to do all the things and gave all the fun. But dang. I am tired. 

Tired of feeling like I have to be perfect every second of the day. Tired of running at 100 miles an hour. Tired of feeling all the emotions of everyone 24/7 and putting mine last. Just tired. I took two naps last weekend and avoided electronics and I STILL felt exhaustion.

I deleted apps, friends on social media, cleaned out emails, cleaned the junk drawers, made donation bags and still... I don't think I need to be cleaning the little things to feel better. This is bigger than that. I gotta dig deep. Better days are coming. The smiles will become genuine once again. I will lower my bar of excellence just enough to catch a breath and recharge.

I will be grateful. I will be aware of my blessings. I will pause to enjoy the little things. I will see the light ahead. I will enjoy each moment. And I will realize that this tough patch will pass just like the others and I will bounce back even stronger than before :)