8 minutes a day...

I just read an article that said the average parent talks to their child for eight minutes a day. 8 minutes. That's not a lot. That's actually really, really sad. I can guess that these are older kids. My 9 year old is constantly chatting away!

I am highly aware I shouldn't believe everything I read (especially online material). However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized I could believe it. Just take away school and sleep and you're at 8 hours a day left. Minus an hour for grooming. And another hour for transporting. 6 hours a day left. 

You would assume those 6 hours are left for 3 solid meals, a snack, homework, extra curriculars, and outings. BUT think about TV time, cell phone time, tablet time, and electronic time (hello, video games!). That skews the data even more.

Why does this bother me so much? Why should it bother you? With all the fancy toys, new electronics, over worked families, stressed kids, and more, people are being pushed thin. 

I work with kids and I coach kids and I am a girl scout leader to little kids. I see the importance of conversations. I realize asking questions, even silly ones, may be the only way to draw a kid out, make them feel secure, and let them know they are important. 

With the world that we live in today, we SHOULD be talking. To each other, to our kids, to anyone who needs it. Let's hope that data is wrong and I am just worrying for nothing. Let's just hope. Talk to your kids! Don't settle for, "fine," when you ask, "How was your day?". Talk to each other!

conferences

Conferences mean one thing to the teacher and one thing to the parent. Tonight I had the pleasure of hearing how kind my child is. We heard how she is a friend to all and a funny person. We know she is a great writer and very creative. Everyone who saw her said hello and looked genuinely interested to see her. Sure, I saw charts of test scores and data tracking. Sure I asked if there were concerns. What really counts is that our teacher sees our kid for who she is and is encouraging her to speak up, stand out, and not be so hard on herself. It is amazing to see her through someone else's eyes and to know that I am not just bias when I say my kid is awesome :)

The guilt is real...

I have a job. I like my job. I like to think I am good at my job. Then I come home and my job switches to "mom". And that job pays in hugs, smooches, snuggles and happiness. The pay is different. The hours are longer. The struggles are more challenging. The laughter is pure. The memories are endless. I work both jobs to the best of my ability. 

Sometimes my day job trumps my mom job and that breaks my heart, but my daughter knows this is our plan and we are on the same team so we work together to make the plan work. I never bring stuff home so that when I am home my mom life trumps everything else. 

Today I was unable to get to her school party. I signed up to donate the pretty decorated plates and helped fill out all the Valentines for her class. We don't really celebrate this particular holiday, but to a 9 year old, this is a big deal. I was able to get to her school right as the party ended. 

I ran through her school like a bat out of hell right as she was cleaning off her desk. She hugged me so long and so tight that I almost cried. I said hello to all the littles and helped clean up, made conversation, and took it all in. I helped get her ready for her next class and waved her off. 

15 minutes is what I gave. I felt guilty until I saw the smile on her face. I gave what I could and she accepted it willingly with love, a huge hug, and a tiny little smile. I stopped feeling guilty for a whopping 10 minutes to realize it really is all the little things. And this little thing was big for me and big for her. I showed up. That's it. That's all. No card. No gift. No bravado. 

That's all that counts. And I am okay with that. This mom thing is hard! I never thought a class party would make me reconsider my life choices, but it did. Stay strong moms! It's all about being present, being flexible, and being willing. 

Brrrr

This is the current weather report. Brrr. Remind me again why we love somewhere that it's DANGEROUS TO GO OUTSIDE!?! Stay warm, folks. Don't forget about your pets. Don't forget to open the cupboards under the sinks. Your pipes will thank you. 

I'm tired, boss

Does anyone remember that scene in Green Mile where John Coffey says, "I'm tired, boss"? That's how I feel sometimes. Tired. Not exhausted or sleepy. Just tired. Tired of cold weather, tired of the sad news, tired of pushing myself to do my best and be my best while others just take a backseat. 

I keep smiling. I keep doing me. I promote positivity with my daughter and show her all the good in this world. But deep down... sometimes I just want to take a break. I want to watch news stations and not panic. I want to see that nonprofits are raking in donations. I want happiness and peace on earth. Unrealistic? Absolutely. Can a girl dream, though? Yep. 

Here's to brighter tomorrows with more smiles, less crime, more charity work, equal and honest work loads, and free cheesecake for everyone! Maybe you don't like cheesecake, but I had to throw something positive in there :)

trucking through winter with craft time

This is the time of year where every second drags on during the day and zips by at night and on the weekend. It's the time to keep your head up and remember that spring is coming! Find something, anything that keeps you smiling. My daughter wanted to do an at home painting party. It took a minute to gather the materials and figure out what the heck we were doing, but it was nice to come home and do a paint session each night until it was done. And what did we learn from this? Patience. We had to plan, wait for the paint to dry, wait for the details to dry, wait for the second coats to dry, and patiently clean it up correctly. They aren't perfect, but they are ours! We learned patience and had fun doing it.